to make monsters out of girls by amanda lovelace
“What happens when the man of your dreams turns out to be a nightmare with sharp teeth and claws?”
Winner of the 2016 Goodreads Choice Award for Best Poetry, amanda lovelace presents her new illustrated duology, “things that h(a)unt.” In this first installment, to make monsters out of girls, lovelace explores the memory of being in an abusive relationship. She poses the eternal question: Can you heal once you’ve been marked by a monster, or will the sun always sting?
I bought this one to complete the duology since I had enjoyed to drink coffee with a ghost more than I expected. And I have to say, compared to it, this isn’t as good. Or maybe it feels less powerful because it is not my first encounter with her poetry. Unsure.
It still is a powerful read. And as someone who had a terrible relationship that I am still healing from, this definitely resonated. One of the things that was interesting to see was how you adapt and sometimes become a monster yourself in self defense. I had become someone defensive and jumpy, someone who would tell you horrible things and be quite critical so you wouldn’t dish those things to me first. But before him I wasn’t as bitter or monstrous.
Still, some poems passed me by, but a lot of them where relevant, including the sun heart ones, as I found my own “sun” heart. The parts that didn’t click, at least I could feel or attempt to understand a little. Not all experiences are the same, but there are some similarities and it is that thread that ties this book together. The pain, the self loathing, the wanting to prove your love and that you are worth loving.
It is a tough book, so read with care, and it has a long list of content warnings at the beginning (something I am grateful for). If you can brave this book, it may be cathartic and helpful to read, like releasing some of the poison in your wounds. Still, do so with care and love and patience.